Snuggles and Tears Chapter 14
Date Published: September 18, 2008, 8:03pm
Written By: BabyButt
Hi All,
Hope you find this entertaining.
Enjoy!
BabyButt
Chapter 14
As Sharon sat holding Billy while eating her breakfast, she noticed he hadn’t picked up his bottle at all. “Drink your ba-ba, Baby.” she told him. When he didn’t pick up the bottle, it suddenly occurred to her, “He hasn’t actually done any of this for himself .”. He hadn’t picked up his binky, bottle, or any of the other baby things. Everything had either been done for him or given to him. Thinking about it for a second, she popped his binky from his mouth and brought the bottle to his lips. He immediately started sucking on the nipple. After a few seconds, she told him "Sweety, I need you to hold your ba-ba so I can eat, I don’t want my food to get cold."with a gentle kiss to his forehead.
Billy knew this was the moment of truth. No matter how you looked at it, if he held that bottle, he couldn’t ever deny that this is what he wanted. Up until now, he could have passed it off as having gone along with what others had wanted. Holding that bottle would say to anyone that cared to look, “I don’t want to be a big boy, I want to be a baby.” because no other part of the population used a baby bottle. Billy started to reach for it, hesitated, and then finally grasped his ba-ba, continuing to nurse throughout the whole thought process. He actually felt relieved when he made the choice.
Sharon saw the indecision and was relieved when he finally took hold of the bottle. She realized he was like a bus with two drivers, each trying to take the bus in separate directions. She was glad the baby boy won that battle, because until Billy came to terms with this, he was going to be one miserable little boy.
Rick was thinking along similar lines as he announced “It’s time we went over the ground rules, little fella.” looking at Billy. Shifting his attention to Sharon, he gave her an expression that said “After you.”.
“Yes, there aren’t many of them, but it is important that you follow them.” Sharon told Billy. “First of all, today, we’re not giving you a choice about any of this. Today you will be treated just like Bobby. Starting tomorrow morning, the choice to continue will be left up to you.” she began.
“Second, your dipeys are your potty. It’s that simple. Don’t bother asking to use the potty Baby, if you want to wear them, then you’ll use them.” Sharon continued. “You are not, under any circumstances, to take off your dipey. You go to your daddy or I or someone that we tell you is OK, and we’ll change you.”.
Becky piped in “Can I change him Mom?”.
Billy immediately blushed. “Not at first Sweety, but in a few days I’ll show you how to change his diaper.” Sharon told her. “Also, I don’t want you in the bathroom without someone with you. I’ll be giving you a bath from now on, so there should be no need for you to be in there alone. Little boys don’t belong in a bathroom by themselves.” she informed him.
As Billy continued to drink hi ba-ba, he really wasn’t sure he could deal with Becky changing his dipey. His mommy had already changed him twice, and both were wonderful experiences, but Becky? He wasn’t sure he could go through with it. “I’ll just ask not to wear them when that comes up.” he thought.
“When you want your binky or your blankie is up to you Baby, and you can have them or not as you please. Your ba-ba will be where you get your drinks today, and your binky…” she said as she pulled a pacifier clip from her pocket and attached it first to his binky and then to his sleeper, “will stay attached to your clothes so it’s close if you need it.” she told him with a smile. “Tomorrow you can decide if you want your ba-ba or a cup, and what to do about your binky”.
“Here comes the big one.” Sharon thought. “Lastly, we will hold you, and cuddle you and treat you like a baby only so long as you are wearing dipeys. If you decide you don’t want to wear them anymore, you won’t have to, but all of the other stuff goes with them. Be very sure you don’t want to do this anymore when you ask to stop, because once that happens, there’s no turning back Sweety. We won’t be going back and forth, it’s too confusing, and wouldn’t be good for you at all.” she finished noticing the fear in his expression as she finished. “My God, he looks like he’s going to cry.” she thought as she pulled him closer to comfort him.
Fear gripped Billy’s belly as he considered what it would mean to go back to the way things were. He couldn’t conceive of it without wanting to cry. Just the thought of not being cuddled by mommy while he drank his ba-ba, or never having his binky again was too much and he lost control as tears made their way down his chubby cheeks. When his mommy hugged him, he dropped his ba-ba, forgetting about it, and clinging to her, began to cry.
“It’s alright Baby, no one’s going to make you stop, I promise.” she gently told him. Picking up his bottle from her lap and putting it on the table, she wrapped her arms around him, pulling his head to her chest. “Shhhhh….” she said as she rocked him gently. “It’s OK Sweety.” she continued.
The way he felt right now made it very easy for Billy to admit to his mommy “Don’t wanna be a big boy.” through his sobs.
Sharon was both overjoyed at that announcement, and scared stiff. She was happy because he had just told her for the first time, in his own words what he wanted. She hadn’t needed to ask him, or to voice his feelings for him. She also had to admit that she didn’t want to give up her baby boy again. Unfortunately, what scared her was the fact that he would have to go back to school in ten days.“There’s no way he can have his pacifier or blankie, or bottle, for that matter, in school.” she thought. Not able to solve that problem right now, she pushed that thought aside and concentrated on comforting Billy. “We’ll work it out somehow.” she thought.
“We’ll worry about that later Sweety, right now I just want you to be the sweetest little baby boy you can be, OK?” she told him, as she gently rubbed his back. That settled him down. A moment later, he reached out and picked up his ba-ba and started to drink.
“Honey, what time did you say everyone was supposed to be here?” Rick asked Sharon, as he looked at the clock that read 9:37.
“Ten O’clock.” she answered, as she felt Billy stiffen in her lap.
Billy froze. It hadn’t even occurred to him that they would do their normal Christmas routine. They would see him toddling around in a dipey, drinking from a ba-ba. His parents and his sister were one thing, but his aunt and uncle, the thought made him cringe. “Grandma will be here too.” he thought. “She’ll think I’m being ridiculous!” as he looked at Mommy, took his ba-ba from his mouth and asked “Do they have to come?” in a whimper.
Sharon knew this was going to happen so she bit the bullet and answered “Yes Baby, they have to come, they’re family and you know we always spend Christmas with family.”
“But they’ll see!” he cried.
“Yes they will.” she responded, “They’ll see the cutest baby boy in the whole world.” as she picked up his blankie from the back of the chair and rubbed it against his face.
Without thinking about it, Billy place his hand on his blankie to keep it in place as Sharon went to move it. “They’ll laugh at me.” he cried softly.
“They most certainly will not!” she told him with no room for discussion. “Sweety, they already know.”.
He looked at her as if she had just betrayed him and cried “Why?!?!” in a loud tear filled voice.
Looking him straight in the eye, she gently responded “Because they are going to be here today, and I wanted to make sure that you wouldn’t be hurt.” with a pain filled expression. “If they had a problem with it, they would be going to Grandma’s instead of coming here. I would never let you be hurt like that Baby.” she finished. “He thought I would put him in harms way.” she thought as her eyes teared.
Seeing Mommy’s tears start to form, Billy felt horrible. “I’m sorry Mommy!” he cried as he jumped up and wrapped his arms tightly around her neck, putting his face against her cheek, “I didn’t mean it!” he sobbed.
“Considering everything that’s happened this morning, I don’t blame him.” she thought. “It’s OK Baby, I understand. It’s been a really difficult morning huh?” she said as she patted his diaper.
Rick had just come to the same conclusion as he watched Billy nod his head. “I tell you what, let’s go see what Santa brought, shall we?” he asked.
Sharon gave him a grateful expression as both kids said “Yeah!”. She was astounded how Billy could go from upset to excited in a heartbeat. After considering it for a second though, she remembered that’s how things were when he was little. “He’s starting to come to terms with this.” she thought.
Billy spun around immediately at the mention of Santa. He got down from his mommy’s lap, grabbed two of her fingers and began trying to pull her to her feet saying “Come on Mommy!”
Rick had to laugh when he saw how excited Billy was. He looked so cute trying desperately to get Sharon to her feet. One of the reason Rick wanted to get started was they had decided to give Billy his Baby toys first. This would allow him to enjoy them instead of being self conscious about it with other people there.
Sharon finally got to her feet with a smile as Billy started to pull her toward the living room. “I’ve got a really excited baby boy.” she said as she tickled his tummy, hearing him giggle. Picking him up and setting him on her hip, she made her way with Becky and Rick toward the presents.
The living room was a large square space just off the kitchen. The walls were decorated with red and green garland sparkling as it caught the light. As they moved into the room, the blinking pattern of the Christmas tree lights caught Billy’s attention. He found himself surrendering to the wonder that all little children have. Everything looked different from his new perspective, from the reflection of the lights on the red and green glass ornaments, to the beautiful angel that sat watching over the room. Each holding his attention for a moment until something else caught his eye.
Sharon pulled Billy up into her lap as she sat down on the L-shaped sectional. Becky sat on the floor in front of her father’s recliner.
Sharon watched Billy as he took in the sight of the Christmas tree. He didn’t notice when she offered him his binky. Only after brushing it against his lips several times did Billy take it in his mouth, never taking his eyes off the tree. “He’s mesmerized.” she thought smiling.
Rick broke Billy’s concentration when he brought a brightly wrapped box over and stood before his son and read “To Baby Billy, from Santa.” and placed the box in his son’s lap.
Billy didn’t even notice that all three of them were watching him as he began to tear the wrapping paper from the box. Two seconds later he had enough of the paper of to see what the gift was, turned to his mommy with wide eyes and a huge smile and said excitedly “Yook Mommy! Yittle People!” and let out a giggle that made everyone laugh.
Sharon couldn’t help but smile as her baby got so excited. “He sounds so precious with his binky.” she thought. For a second she wished they had video taped this event, thinking sooner or later he would get tired of this and grow up and away from her. She remembered why they didn’t though, God forbid anyone get a look at that tape and embarrass him. Forgetting the future and any possible threat of disaster, she committed herself to enjoying the sights, sounds and smells of having her baby boy right here and now. Leaning forward, inhaling the mixed scents of baby powder and shampoo, she kissed him atop his little head and said “Yes Baby!” with a big smile.